Prop 8 has been overturned, and I am fairly confident that anyone that knows me or reads my blog semi regularly knows that I am not only relieved, I feel it was the right decision. I know there are several out there who agree, and several who disagree.

I am not here to make points on why I think the repeal was the morally just decision; I can save that for a whole other blog post. I have made an observation, however. Those people who are in favor of Prop 8 generally do not know or associate themselves with many gay people, either knowingly or by choice. Those who think Prop 8 was wrong generally do.

A long time ago, someone who I consider far more than a friend to me came out. It was the first time anyone had ever told me they were gay before. Not long before the admission, I had made the comment, "you can't persecute people for who they're attracted to... gay people just can't HELP it!"

I am terribly embarrassed by this comment now. I wasn't homophobic in the least, I was simply ignorant. Not being able to "help" something has far too negative of a connotation. It is something people say in reference to terrible diseases ("She has cancer and is throwing up because she can't help it") or apologies ("I am so sorry I ate the last of the chips, I just could't help myself!")

I made this comment not because I was anti-gay. I made it because I had never known a gay person. Later on this same friend had his heart broken, not because he fell in love with a man, but because he had the terrible misfortune of falling in love with a jerk. (Gay people: they're just like us!!) I have seen people formerly squeamish over his homosexuality come to accept the guy he's with now, as he has had the amazing perseverance to show them he is still the same person, and an even better version of himself for knowing fully who he is.

In my eyes, he is remarkable because he is my friend. But his journey is not rare, and his situation is not special. His love is beautiful, but far from unique. Not unique means unfair when treated as an exception.

And with a heavy sigh, that is all. Start the cutthroat debate as you will.